12 STEP GUIDE

by Amanda B

How The Steps Work

Steps:  Task: Get You Right With:
 1,2,3. Build spiritual foundation Higher Power
4, 5, 6, 7 Inventory steps Yourself
 8, 9 Amends steps The world
10, 11, 12 Spiritual growth steps The universe
     

Three Keys To Success

A sobriety date - A sponsor - A home group

 

AA Simplified

The problem is powerlessness over  alcohol

The necessary action is work the steps

 Why Go to Meetings?

As a newcomer, it is wise to listen for similarities between you and those speaking or sharing in meetings.  It is in the meetings where you can find solutions for problems, an ideal sponsor, and support in your recovery.  Many of us have difficulty in social situations when we first enter recovery.  So, if nothing else, your social skills and understanding of people can improve with attending meetings.  But no matter what stage you’re at, your experience may help another recovering alcoholic/addict.  It helps to build a network of those serious about their recovery – a family, if you will, in which each can help the other.

 Why Get a Sponsor?

In the Big Book of AA, nothing is said about a sponsor.  The Big Book does describe, however, “one alcoholic working with another” – and that is the foundation of AA.  Nowadays, a sponsor is someone who guides you through the steps – someone who has been where you are now and can help you get where you want to be: someone who has done the 12 Steps, who has significantly more time, and is serious about the program of recovery. 

 What is Not a Sponsor?

  1. Someone of the opposite gender.  Although many of us have difficulties with people of our own gender, they are the ones who better understand where we have been and can be of more help to us.  Not to mention the complications likely to arise with the opposite gender whether it be sexual, emotional, or other. 
  2. An ATM or a loan shark.  Most of us do have financial problems when we come in.  But each of us needs to fix this, along with our other problems, on our own.
  3. Someone who will co-sign your stupidity.  It takes a real friend to call you on your nonsense in order to help you see when you might be heading down the wrong path.

 HOW TO DO THE STEPS

             The most important thing you need to know is that all twelve steps are in the Big Book.  Each person’s experience with the steps varies either in style, format, or function, to some degree.  The following is a record of how I, among many others, completed the twelve steps.  And since doing them, I have not found it necessary to drink or use any other substance.

  STEP 1: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.

 Read:

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Write an autobiography from birth until now, as detailed as possible, omitting nothing.  Try to remember and write down all you can.  It is well worth it.

 STEP 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

 Read: Page 44, start of 1st paragraph to page 152, end of 2nd paragraph

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

 STEP 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

 Read: Page 60, start at “Being convinced…” to page 64,      end at start of 1st paragraph (at top of page)

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: When ready, recite the 3rd step prayer on page 63.

 STEP 4: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

 Read: Page 64, start of 1st paragraph to page 71, end of chapter.

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Make four columns on one sheet of paper as shown below.  Going from left to right, fill in the information for each resentment.  Exclude nothing and no one. 

 

I’m Resentful at

The Cause

Affects My

My Part

Name

What he/she did

Security, personal relations, or sex relations self-esteem

What I did to instigate it or how I reacted badly

 

STEP 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

 Read: Page 72, start of 1st paragraph to page 75, end of 2nd paragraph (“…with the Spirit of the Universe.”)

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Take your fourth step and read it in its entirety to your sponsor.

 STEP 6: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

 Read: Page 75, start of 3rd paragraph (“Returning…”) to page 76, start of 3rd paragraph (at middle of page)

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Look over your 4th and 5th steps.  Write down and review your character defects and decide whether or not you are ready to be rid of them all.

 STEP 7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

 Read: (Same as step 6) Page 75, start of 3rd paragraph (“Returning…”) to page 76, start of 3rd paragraph (at middle of page)

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Ask your Higher Power to remove your character defects.  A good example of what to say is the 7th step prayer on page 76.

 STEP 8: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

 Read: Page 76, start of 3rd paragraph to page 84, at start of 2nd paragraph (middle of page)

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Use your fourth step and build on it with any newly remembered people or organizations that you have harmed.  Write an amends letter to each of them.  Read your amends letters to your sponsor (or other trusted person, preferably in the program).  Your sponsor can help you decided which of them should not be delivered for the safety of either you or the recipient.

STEP 9: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

 Read: (Same as step 8) Page 76, start of 3rd paragraph to page 84, at start of 2nd paragraph (middle of page)

Write: Reflect on what you read.

Task: Read your amends letters to their recipients and mail them to those that you cannot deliver in person. 

  STEP 10: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

 Read: Page 84, start of 3rd paragraph to page 85, at start of last paragraph

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Do a written nightly inventory reviewing your actions and to whom you may owe an amends.  This is also a good place to review what you have done for others.

 STEP 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

 Read: Page 85, start at last paragraph to page 88, end of the page

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: Get into the habit of saying a morning and bedtime prayer like those outlined on page 86.

  STEP 12: Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

 Read:

Write: Reflect on what you read. 

Task: This is where you do what you can to help other alcoholics.  This involves but is not limited to a) giving your phone number to those newer than you to the program, b) volunteering/working at a rehab, Alano club or detox, and of course sponsoring.  What matters most for this step is that we “work with another alcoholic”, as is said in The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous